


So long and good night

by apieformydean



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Ballet, Dancer!Phil, Dancing, First Kiss, Kissing, M/M, One Shot, Phan - Freeform, Please like it, Theatre, but if you guys like it i could write more to it, sound engineer!Dan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-23
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-05-31 00:21:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6447928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apieformydean/pseuds/apieformydean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The love story of the dancer and the sound engineer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	So long and good night

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, the title refers to Helena. Because I'm awesome like that.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You see, the problem with being bi in theatre is that not only gorgeous women catch your attention, but beautiful men as well.
> 
> And oh boy, was Phil a beauty.

Modern ballet in theatre was gay.

Not that Dan was homophobic. That's the last thing he was, being bi himself.

By gay he didn't mean lame or shitty, he meant homosexual. Just everything was gay in connection with it; the costumes, the music, the dance itself. The fact, that almost half of the male dancers were queer didn't help the statistics either.

Dan was amazed by it, nonetheless. He loved his job as sound engineer in the theatre, he had been doing it for two years now. It had always been kind of a dream for him to work in the theatre, and he hoped one day he'd be able to prove himself on stage as well. Till then, he had the responsibility for every sound to work just fine during ballets. And it had never been a problem.

Never before four months earlier, when an angel called Phil Lester had appeared in his life.

You see, the problem with being bi in theatre is that not only gorgeous women catch your attention, but beautiful men as well.

And oh boy, was Phil a beauty. The grace in his every movement was ridiculously amazing, his pretty body and angelic face might have given Dan a heart attack once or twice. He’d moved back to Manchester from London, because his career as a dancer didn't really work out for him there.

So, he stepped in the main entrance of the theatre some months prior for the first time and Dan managed to totally embarrass himself in front of Phil in like ten seconds. Long story short, he practically fell on the floor in front of the boy, tripping over his own feet. The not-so-distant memory made Dan cringe uncontrollably every time.

He actually had a best friend working as costume designer called Louise. She could tell immediately that the new boy was the reason Dan was flustered whenever it was about the Macbeth ballet-adaptation.

It may sound strange, but Dan can assure you, the play was fucking awesome. The choreography was magical, the music was amazing and the lighting was mystical. The story was perfectly understandable, which is quite rare among these kind of adaptations. Dan was surprised at that as well for the first time.

It was all okay, Louise was only slightly teasing him, he even managed to introduce himself properly to Phil. Turned out, he’s that ray-of-sunshine kind of person. He never seemed to stop smiling, he was smart and kind and beautiful. Dan loved every second he got to be with him, even if it was a moment in the cafeteria, it was most certainly the highlight of his day.

It was all okay, until one day, like a month ago, Louise pulled Dan away to the changing rooms on his way to the cafeteria to meet Phil as usual. The girl had a horrified yet excited expression on her face as she explained what she’d found out.

Thomas, dancing the role of Macbeth, had been a dancer for like a year or two at the theatre, and Dan never really sympathised with him even before Phil.

He was now lifting Phil up, and Dan’s eyes followed as the ebony haired boy’s legs wrapped around the man’s torso like a ribbon. They made it look the most effortless thing on Earth, Dan almost believed for a moment that he could do it as well.

Watching the two dance together would have been mesmerising, hadn’t he known from Louise they’d been a couple once.

He wanted to forget it so bad, but of course he couldn’t. Now all he could concentrate on were the hands of Thomas on Phil’s hips, the way the man held him so firmly and looked at Phil from under his sweaty blond hair. Dan was watching them and tried to imagine why the heck could have those two break up. He hated to admit it, but they seemed to… to just fit.

"Dan, what’s going on?"

He jumped when PJ, the stage manager called his name through his headset. Dan immediately knew he fucked up; the fight scene was over, Macbeth's wife was walking up to her husband and Dan needed to change the music. He quickly pushed two and a half buttons, clicked just the right switches and the music of the love scene was on. Phil had already left the stage.

The scenes came and went and Dan found he really didn’t care; he had seen the rehearsals a thousand times, already worked through it six times, and being a theatre nerd, he knew the story by heart. He didn’t really need to pay attention, he knew automatically when to change the music, when to fade it down or up. The only scene he still enjoyed as if he saw it for the first time was the last one. Featuring Phil, of course. He would kill Macbeth and walk away with the hottest expression on his face. It was easily the best part of the whole ballet.

And there he was, walking in like a fucking warrior, grabbing Thomas by the shoulder and turning him towards himself with force. Phil took a fistful of Macbeth’s collar and yanked him against the floor. Thomas put his hands on Phil’s hips and threw him over his head. Phil rolled on the floor but was quickly back on his feet and launched himself on Macbeth again.

Dan bit his lower lip. Phil was all sweaty and was panting lightly, his bare arms pressed against Thomas’ body. Doesn’t it sound like a porno to you? Because it surely did to Dan.

His body responded to it as well. He felt his palms sweating, his breathing was a tiny bit quicker now. Dan watched as Phil stood on his feet again, now over the dead body of Macbeth and after a last glance at Thomas, he walked down from the stage. All eyes were on him, and Dan needed to fade the music down as he walked out.

He really tried to ignore the small bulge in Phil’s ballet pants but  _ of fucking course _ he couldn’t.

Dan was making his way to the small bar right next to the theatre. The place was meant to be privately for the cast and crew, but obviously there was a price for which anyone could join the party. Which was certainly something Dan hated. If they were about to kick up the heels as a team, why did others need to ruin it? Maybe it was only his misanthropic self speaking.

"Dan, darling!" Louise waved at him from the other side of the room as he stepped in the bar. She was wearing a dotted black and white dress and sipping some yellow drink. She was chatting with a bunch of people – Dan recognised another costume designer and a scriptwriter among them – but when she saw Dan, she left them to meet him.

There was a staircase leading up to the gallery, dozens of people sitting, speaking and dancing there as well. The ground floor was full, the music was blasting and Dan already wanted out.

He never really fancied these kind of parties, even though there were some people he genuinely liked there. However, since the premiere of their Macbeth he always wanted to come. It was the first time he actually made it.

"Hey Louise," Dan cleared his way to the blonde with his elbows and shoulders and was now finally standing in front of her. He took his jacket off and put it on a bar stool next to himself. "How come you’re here?" he asked, because earlier that week she was not sure if her husband was able to stay with their daughter for the night. Having a kid was an unbelievable responsibility, Dan thought.

"Oh, Matt agreed that I needed some time for myself," she chuckled over the sound of the music. "Anyways, congrats on the Macbeth today."

"You watched it?" Dan asked with a smirk.

"Yeah, since I only saw it like three times so far," she explained, rolling her eyes. "And you know, the strange thing is, I couldn’t help but notice how the sound engineer slipped a bit after Mr. Hottie Lester was pushed up against the wall in his too tight pants and-"

"Okay, I think I get it, thanks," Dan cringed and walked to the bartender, knowing Louise would follow him for sure. After buying a cherry cocktail for himself, he turned back to her. "You are so gross, I have no idea why I’m putting up with you."

"Because I know your secret, honey," was her cheeky answer.

"Know what secret?" PJ chimed in, suddenly standing next to Dan out of nowhere.

" _ Jesus _ , don’t ever dare to do that again!" Louise shoved the stage manager in the shoulder, laughing loudly at his derpy expression.

"I’m sorry, you are right," PJ put up his hands as the sign of surrender. "The woman who designs such heavy-duty ballet costumes deserves a better treatment," he mused with a half grin.

"You see, that’s much better," Louise pretended to blush and turned to Dan. "I deserve much better."

"And Dan, I think I don’t really tell you enough that I’m really grateful you happen to be my sound engineer," PJ smiled at the brunet and Dan frowned. Maybe Peej had drunk a bit more than he should’ve. "I don’t really understand what happened today with the love scene but it was some minor complication. I just want to thank you for working with me, okay?"

And Dan started to laugh. He really didn’t mean to but he needed to.

"The pleasure is all mine, honestly," Dan put a hand on the stage manager’s shoulder while making sure he didn’t spill his drink on him.

"I’d ask you what you mean by this but I think there are others who you should thank as well, Peej," Louise told him, but she looked at Dan all along. The sound engineer knew what was to come before it happened.

"Hey guys," a too sweet voice greeted the three of them, and Dan didn’t know if he was really happy to meet Phil or if he wanted to be anywhere else in that moment.

"My shining stars!" PJ opened his arms wide and hugged Phil and another man who Dan really just wanted to avoid for life.

"Okay, I really think you should get home before you do some harm to yourself, Peej," Thomas told the stage manager and everybody laughed at it, first of all PJ himself. Dan tried to grin as well but really failed when PJ let the two of them go and he saw Thomas had his arm around Phil’s waist. The latter was wearing a short-sleeved salmon shirt that revealed all his muscles, with black skinnies and red chucks, some yellowish drink in his hand. Thomas’ jeans were hanging low on his hips, his white crop top showed the contour of everything underneath it. He was drinking beer. What a  _ manly man _ , Dan thought bitterly.

"Dan, are you okay?" Louise asked the sound engineer, genuinely worried expression on her face. She successfully drew attention at him from the others.

"Sure, it’s nothing, maybe I need… another one of this," he held up his glass, thankful for it being empty at the moment. The others seemingly believed him and went back to their small talk as if it was nothing.

Except Phil.

The blue-eyed dancer was looking at Dan, softly, as if he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to do that. When Dan caught his eye, both of them were staring, blues and browns trying to read each other. Dan had no idea what Phil saw in his, but the dancer’s expression was suddenly the saddest the brunet ever saw it. The ebony-haired man realised it a moment later than the sound engineer did, and he turned away from him immediately.

"Heeey," came a shrieking noise from Dan's left and two girls jumped in his view. They were some newby musical actresses, and even though Dan thought about it with disgust, he really did want to be in their place.

"Ladies," Thomas greeted them with a huge smile. His arm fell from around Phil's hips and motioned towards their group for the girls with too little clothes on to join.

"You wanna dance, Tommy?" one of them asked immediately, stepping close to the dancer, putting her hands on his chest. Her huge smoky eyes roamed over his muscular figure and she was pulling him to the dancefloor already.

"And you, handsome?" her slightly prettier but less drunk friend grabbed Dan's hand. The brunet gently pulled away from her, shaking his head. There was only one person there he wanted to dance with and it wasn't her.

"What a shame," called Thomas over the music. "Then it's my fortune to take both of you with me, darlings."

The girls just grinned at him and followed as Thomas swayed his hips while walking. He was so gay, Dan thought. He had no idea why the girls thought he was going to give either of them more than a dance.

"I think I shouldn't say things like this but if I weren’t married…" PJ blurted out while grinning at the man’s moves as he tried to dance with both of the girls at once.

"Jesus, Peej, stop," Dan groaned. "He’s dancing with girls, you can’t make a move on a guy dancing with girls."

"He's bi, actually," Phil shrugged. He just said it. As if Dan didn’t know it. Instead of an answer he just huffed bit.

"See?" PJ grinned at the sound engineer. "My gay-dar is working perfectly well."

"Alright, I guess that you, mister, really need a cab home," Louise chimed in suddenly, taking PJ's hand. She took a last glance at Dan, giving him an encouraging little smile, and after saying goodbye to Dan and Phil, she took Peej with her, to the door and out.

The music was still blasting, the place was dusky, Dan was sipping his cocktail, Thomas was grinding against the girls and Phil’s beautiful eyes wouldn’t stop staring at Dan. The sound engineer tried to ignore it for a minute or so, but he had to speak when he couldn’t take it anymore.

"So, you and Thomas…" he offered, bit loudly over the music. The other boy seemed to think about it for a moment.

"Well, yeah, kind of," Phil finally looked away from him, which made it easier for Dan to breathe. "You have heard the rumours in the theatre, haven’t you? I mean, we broke up like a year ago, but now that I’m here- I mean, it’s complicated."

"Like it always is in theatre," Dan added quietly, looking down in his glass. He needed to know. Not like it would have been easier for him if he knew the guy wasn’t taken. He was  _ so _ out of his league.

"Yeah, I guess…" Phil was looking into the dancing crowd, clearly watching Thomas, with no clear reaction on his face. "But how are you, Dan?" he looked back at the brunet by his side, smiling a bit. "I haven’t met you in some days."

Some days. Funny, Dan thought. It must have been ‘some days’ for Phil, while it seemed to be ages for Dan, and really, it has been a week. They both had different schedules, the only time they could have met were the parties like this one. And Dan really hated parties like this one. All the too sexual dancing and drunk people and shitty music was too much for him. He only joined this time because he needed to find out if Phil and Thomas still had something.

He was really good at giving up what he wanted, and this information certainly helped him in it.

"Yeah, I’ve been a bit busy," Dan finally decided on lying.

"Oh," Phil lifted his eyebrows. "Is it Louise?"

"What-  _ Nooo _ , nope," Dan shook his head, chuckling. "She’s my best friend, I’m sure it would never work for us."

"Because you’re gay or…?" Phil tried and Dan was quite taken aback by it. Phil must have sensed it, because he looked like he regretted the question immediately. “I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry, Dan, it’s none of my-”

“No, it’s fine, really,” he was quick to reassure him. “I’m just… not used to people asking directly what they want to know, is all. And by the way, I’m bi," he replied when he saw Phil relax a bit. "And Louise has a husband and a daughter, Darcy."

"Oh, I see," Phil seemed to be thinking about it for a moment. "And PJ is married, he said?"

"Yeah, his husband, Chris, was my mate at uni," Dan explained. "They are together since like forever."

"And what about you?" Phil asked. Dan would have grinned at the situation, hadn’t he known the reason for him asking was not what Dan wanted it to be.

"Nope, this lad is as single as it gets," he replied and realised how pathetic he must have sounded.

"Sometimes it’s not a bad thing," Phil reassured him quietly. Dan first thought he was only trying to cheer him up but after a moment he felt like there was more to it.

"And how are you?" Dan asked softly. "Maybe it’s just the artistic melancholy but you look a bit down the dumps nowadays."

"Do I?" Phil asked back and his eyes wandered on Thomas and the two girls. They didn’t say a thing for some moment but then Dan  _ had _ to ask.

"Is it him?"

"No," Phil replied immediately, but his expression gave him away. He looked away from both Thomas and Dan, towards the door of the bar, maybe considering leaving the brunet.

"If you don’t want him to dance with others, why didn’t you say anything?" Dan pushed the subject.

"I told you, it’s complicated," Phil looked at Dan in the eyes and the sound engineer felt his throat tighten. The dancer had tears in his eyes, his lips were curving downwards.

"Fuck, I’m sorry, I can’t shut my bloody mouth," Dan babbled, looking down at his feet, feeling like a goddamn idiot.

"It-it’s okay, not your fault," Phil wiped at his eyes. "Maybe alcohol is really not for me," he tried to chuckle but it sounded just really sad. He placed his drink on the counter and turned back to Dan with a sigh. "Would you like to get some fresh air?"

 

It seemed a lot colder outside than it was when Dan arrived. The street was almost totally empty, except some cars and a few people making their way home. The only sound they could hear was the music coming from the bar but somehow it was calming now.

Phil stood not too far from the door, digging into his jacket pockets and pulling out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. Dan frowned as he lit a cigarette and put it in his mouth.

"Would you like one?" Phil asked, holding out the pack towards the brunet when he saw the other was staring.

"No, thanks, I don’t smoke," Dan put up a hand so Phil slid the pack back into his pockets. "That does some nasty shit to your health."

"There are worst things I could do," Phil smiled a bit at his own reference, taking a sip from the cigarette. Even though Dan was serious about it being a bad habit, he had to stop himself from jumping Phil while the dancer smoked. It was one of the hottest things he saw him do.

"Haven’t even congratulated you on today’s show," Dan remembered, and Phil just turned to him, smile still on his lips.

"I haven’t, either," he added. "How come you work in the theatre, by the way?"

"You know those kind of dreams you have as a kid and it sticks with you pretty much forever?" Dan mused. "Theatre is that for me."

"I know the feeling," Phil hummed. "I’ve always been the dance freak in school. You can imagine, the 17-year-old gay boy who does ballet. I was the stereotype," he chuckled.

"You were out in school?" Dan asked with slight surprise.

"I’ve never denied I was queer," Phil replied, flicking his cigarette.

"I did," Dan said, looking down at his feet.

"Why?"

"Because it has never been safe to come out," he explained. "My family and my friends and teachers and everybody… where I come from, being queer is the biggest deviance."

"I’m sorry, Dan," Phil looked at him with a sympathetic expression.

"Yeah, it was okay till I fell for a dude," Dan shook his head. "But it’s all alright now, I guess. I can date whoever the fuck I want."

Except who he really wanted at the moment, he added bitterly in his head.

"I think I haven’t really appreciated that I had no problems like this as a kid," Phil told him. Silence fell between them for a minute. Phil was smoking, Dan thought about going home but his fucking curiosity didn’t let him drop the topic.

"Do you want to talk about Thomas?" Dan tried quietly, not looking at the dancer immediately. "It’s okay if you don’t," he reassured the other.

"Why do you care, Dan?" Phil asked, blue eyes finding Dan’s in the dim light of the lamp nearby.

"I just want you to know, if you need a friend, you know where to find me," he told him, and it sounded so cheesy he almost regretted saying it.

"It really isn’t anything special," Phil shook his head and tossed his cigarette bud in the trash next to him. "Time passes, feelings fade away and sometimes you can’t bring them back, no matter how hard you try."

Dan couldn’t stop himself, he stepped in front of Phil, took his cheeks between his hands and kissed him. The dancer tasted like smoke and didn’t even kiss back for a moment, just froze under Dan’s lips. When his first shock was over, Phil put his hands on Dan’s hips and kissed back. Dan would’ve sworn Phil was the best kisser he had the fortune to meet. His tongue was smart and quick, and clearly hungry for the kiss, which made Dan’s knees weak. Phil couldn’t possibly want to kiss Dan like that. You don’t just go and kiss guys like that.

Phil’s hands pushed up the jacket a bit on Dan’s hips and touched the warm flesh. A chill ran down Dan’s spine as he tangled his fingers in Phil’s hair and tugged at it. The dancer flipped them over, suddenly pushing Dan against the wall of the bar and snogging him mercilessly. Dan could feel his jeans getting a bit tight around his crotch area. He didn’t even know he was into guys taking control over him.

In that moment, the door of the bar opened, and the two boys didn’t really pay attention to it. Not until a voice talked to them.

"Phil?"

Dan and Phil’s eyes shot open and grew huge at the same time when they realised the voice belonged to Thomas. Phil stepped back from Dan as fast as he could but it was too late.

"What the fuck is going on?" Thomas roared when he saw it was Dan pushed against the wall. The sound engineer didn’t feel like explaining or anything, his tongue was just as weak as his knees after making out with the hottest man alive.

"Tommy, it was not-" Phil tried, with no use, of course.

"What the fuck were you doing with my boyfriend?" Thomas yelled at Dan, who suddenly felt very small. The blonde dancer gritted his teeth as he grabbed his shirt on his chest. "I asked you something, Howell!" but before Dan could have answered, a fist met his face and a flaming shot of pain waved through his head.

"No, stop!" Phil yelled and Dan could barely register that he was pulling Thomas away from him until he didn’t have anything to support him and he fell on the ground hard. He couldn’t really see anything with his left eye but stars.

"It was me, Tommy, stop!" Phil tried again, and it seemed to work.

"Why would you kiss  _ anything _ like him?" Thomas asked in a disgusted voice.

"I’m drunk, love, please don’t hurt him!"

Dan was laying on the ground and listened to the two of them shout. At some point Phil managed to drag Thomas away from Dan and the two dancers left.

The sound engineer had no idea how the fuck he managed to get himself in such a trouble.

The only thing he knew was that the punch was totally worth it for a kiss from Phil Lester.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you guys like it? I mean some comments and/or kudos would be nice? Because I think I know where I'd take this story?  
> I'M A SLUT FOR FEEDBACK OKAY


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